loveConverse

Why don’t we love ourselves like we love our shoes?

My converse… these are shoes that have been places and seen things and carry on…. in my opinion they look more beautiful now that they are worn…. the stains and cracks….

Understandable to be sad when they get too worn. Too old.

But don’t start hating them… continue to love them and want them to last just a little bit longer… till finally you have to let them go.

Helaughsatmywar

I am at war. A greater war then the one within myself wages all around me. I go into the kitchen, I walk to the sink, I turn on the sink, and the war rages around me. The struggle of keeping food down when flies are swarming around the room at a dizzying rate – I watch two of them fucking on the fruit fly trap – ON not IN – just casually fucking on top of it – a literal ‘fuck you’ from the fruit flies – and that’s why I know this is war.
>they’re breeding but I am one – a one-woman insane hand clapper against the mob – I jump around clapping my hands at them desperate to catch them in between – nothing but complete annihilation will satisfy me.
>He’s laughing at me again. I know he is. “Is this what it means to support yourself as a woman?” Saying goodbye to him was the best decision I made – best choice I made last year… now if only to get rid of the flies… the mold will have to wait.

really though… what am I going to do with the above quote? Nothing… just take up space… basically life right there… nothing… just take up space. I take up space, therefore I am. trying to take up less and less…

 

 

grab me tight

pick me out of your box of bento
that’s what I’m here for/ to be touched/ and don’t feel guilt/  hasn’t crossed your mind though/ sometimes I think about you and feel sad/ so I started a literature club in your honor/ and one by one we trickle out/ guess it should be called the suicide club/ but that’s already been taken/ by fake characters/ like me and you/ and there are lines on the ceiling
but I keep looking for gold.

bento010220171603tooold2bento010220171603yourecoldbento010220171603youremoldbento010220171603deleted

PookyGaga

[23:44, 12/30/2017] : okay maybe he’s just like a nerd and a huge fan of the comedian… like you know don’t miss something you really love for a romantic person… like my friend who didn’t go overseas to study abroad because of her boyfriend AT THE TIME – in other words now ex.
[23:48, 12/30/2017]: do you like Lady Gaga? Totally have that Government Hooker song stuck in my head… I mean aren’t we all? yah face

sundaymorning11181952

 

#SaDDS

The thing about Jellyfish is they’re awesome. Found the little buddy below on Etsy. And Princess Jellyfish anyone?

backinthe90s1228171652

like great and don’t look all whistful
this is normal – he doesn’t want to get in my pants and why on earth am I being so sensitive and accusing him of only trying to get in my ‘Glory Hole’? – nope, no big deal he bought me a really nice gift and escorts me out the door and tells me his life story and his secrets… no, he just wants to be good ‘friends’ … cuz this is beyond manager at this point… debated waiting to tell me either today or tomorrow that he could be leaving… ‘because tomorrow is a better day.” (it was) christmas … not going to get a better day.. or worse… to share someitng ‘sad’ … sure he just wants to be friends… even though he says ‘I don’t have any reason to stay here. nothing tying me here’ sure it’s all in my mind… being vain and thinking that implying that I could be enough of a reason for him to make a tie with?! sure sure sure all in my head… just super angry…
for no reason…
i’m sure… sureeee… sureeeeeee

BUT IT’S ALL FINE!

“SUCK A DICK DUMB SHITS!”

suckadick122817

There’s blood all over the floor

Yeah the dude wouldn’t tap out. Okay cool. Snap broke his leg.
Man that’s awesome!

This is how guys talk. At least the ones at work. They feel the need to be macho and brag about how the seriously injured another because the other didn’t tell them not to. The not saying to stop is a green light to go. It’s not just the whole with women – it’s with anyone. As long as you don’t say enough loud and clear, prepared to be trampled to death. The elephants are coming.

Another guy; drunk coming into the lobby says too loudly, not that he can help it; he’s drunk after all, “There’s blood all over the floor all around me like man I’m on my period.”

I look at my co-workers. Both male and both making a shit load more than me. They look at me. I impersonate the man “‘I’m on my period.’ Well FUCK YOU BUDDY!!!” they both laugh one of them joins in “You don’t know what it’s LIKE!” And the other “You begin throwing tampons at him.”

They continue to joke. I mean yeah… I’ve actually felt the need to throw tampons at men before… they just don’t get it. “I understand.” Sure you do buddy… sure you do.

youtoldmetotapoutididnt

I remember screaming with you.Both the good kind and the bad kind/the good kind of the soul squelching/the bad kind of the soul breaking/

unfinished

Shirley

It’s all so ineffectual and lame. Coming up with excuses to negate the game.

Wow broke the fourth wall because that makes it more real – more real than the pain behind the dead girls who got deleted but not forgotten for now, but hey at least you got a kick and a laugh a chill and a shiver a response from someone across the waves.

Love you, Monika the squid, always,

 

dontForgt

Delete her.

Because people kill themselves every day.

And I just keep playing and playing

like it’s no big deal.

Like I’ll actually find

 

a way out.

(only a dead you will make me happy)XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

800P 😀

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